I’m back. Nice to see you all again. Thank you to the person who recently started following my blog — it was the nudge I needed to start typing again.
To bring you up to date. I for some reason started having the occasional glass of wine or beer last June. I had no interest in moderation, and still have no interest in moderation. I think it’s a lousy idea and am not sure why I stopped not drinking. Sometimes I wonder if it was because I stopped not eating sugar. In any case, I got lazy.
Fortunately, alcohol kind of makes me sick now. Even a drink or two. I think that’s awesome. But it is definitely a slippery slope, and I want traction!
I have a pretty clear sense of the magnet that alcohol is for me, and I can see what the work is I need to do. I’ve been well within the “low risk” limits of the NIAAA in terms of quantity, and yet it’s obvious that my life is deeply better when I draw the line at zero. Drawing the line at zero lets me have the conversations I need to have with myself, learn how to stay present. Simply staying present creates the conditions within which I morph into who I need to be. I’m 48. Mid-life catharsis 🙂
Thank god for cyberspace, a place where I can think out loud, be accountable, continue on this journey in conversation with all of you on your own journeys.
I’m putting a couple of things back into my daily life that I think are key for keeping on track. One is cutting out sugar. I know that there’s a common thought that a person quitting alcohol shouldn’t make other major changes at the same time. I think that’s decent advice and I do have intimate experience with black-and-white thinking. However, I think that alcohol and sugar are a unique case (for reasons I hope to type about soon in the form of a meander around Potatoes Not Prozac.)
I’m also going back to near-daily oil massages. While there’s a biochemical rationale behind the decision to quit sugar, I have no idea why oil massages are so powerful. They’re immensely calming. Like silk sheets or a hot bath on a dry, cold, windy day. I don’t know if it’s me, or the drying effects of alcohol over the years, or if it’s everybody. But it’s medicine over here.
Lastly, I want to say how grateful I am for those folks who are months and now years into a life without alcohol who are still writing. Thank you all.
Have a good one!