Ways of stopping the cycle

Continuing to mull over how the nondrinking life works over the long haul ….

Many of the regularly discussed in-the-moment tricks seem not to work for me. Fear of regret — remind myself that I would be back to day 1, would wake up in the middle of the night parched and pissed — nope. Of utterly no importance to Wolfie/Bernandette in the moment. Reach out for support? Nope, why would you? It would ruin this nice little insane craving that’s about to lead to drinking as the only solution.

So how to improve this situation, the odds of sticking with myself under conditions of duress? Here are some things. It’s not a complete list. I still need more to protect against the flashes.

  • Avoid getting cold if I’m in or near a socially stressful situation. Or at least know that physical discomfort in those times is dangerous and try to avoid that happening.
  • Remember that conferences are exhausting and stressful. Even though you love them. Skip out on dinners and lunches, and bring comfort drinks from home. (Do not, do not leave home without peppermint tea. I know it can be found in every supermarket in America. Still don’t leave home without it in the backpack.)
  • Bring a thermos of hot water in the car if you’re going to be seeing your sister. A stiff mint tea will be needed on the ride home.

I know there’s more. Maybe I’ll see another after the next moment of distress.

If you’ve struggled with failed split-second reasoning/tricks/strategies and found new ones that work, I’d be curious to hear about them. The more counter-intuitive the better!


2 thoughts on “Ways of stopping the cycle

  1. All I have are the typical ideas!
    But I think your point is a good one… we need to have our own coping tools depending on our situation regarding our drinking.

    I know I have to leave early from small dinner parties. Unless there is dessert and coffee served! Ha.

    And it’s important for me to bring my own low calorie ginger beer. Or my AF drink of choice.



    • These are great reminders. Leaving early (especially if combined with arriving late! if it’s not a sit-down thing) is highly underappreciated. I’ve also been thinking about the question of bringing a personal drink. It’s obviously not been an issue for a year now, and in my IA life it’s not an issue because almost no parties even have alcohol (super weird situation, I know), but I’m going to an outdoor wedding in May and need to get a plan.

      Liked by 1 person

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